First of all congratulations on the realizations you've had gender-wise, that's so exciting! <3 If you want to talk about anything else in a safe, confidential space feel free to DM me on fedi. :-)

And gosh I've mostly worn dresses (or pants where it really didn't show) and so I actually have never tucked! Plus I had an orchiectomy two years into my transition and so it made it even less of a thing after that.

Let me do this for you though: I'll pitch this from my fedi account and we can see what kind of replies we get. I'll ask a loved one too as I know she's had good luck with tucking underwear. Check back on this thread on fedi for hopefully some good answers. :3

Wishing you the best!

it's definitely nothing fancy - an old dell latitude d630 business laptop from 2007 i had sitting around with windows xp professional sp3 installed. very late gen for win xp but it has really good support for it. it also has a dedicated graphics card and i put an ssd in it so it's not bad for gaming depending on the age of the game

intel core 2 duo t9500 @ 2.6GHz
nvidia quadro nvs 135m
4gb of ram

it's seen many, many lives at this point going back to my college days. now it's just for games ranging from 1996-ish through the mid-2000s. lots of road rash, marble blast gold, jazz jackrabbit 2, ut99 and unreal ed 1.0, halo, tons of stuff from childhood (including all my files from back then... 1999-2004), and most recently tes3 construction set

hmmm, i always have a difficult time categorizing myself here... i'll try to mostly explain a bit about how i see us and the world instead, at least at age 33 - it's definitely changed and matured a lot over the decades and i expect it will continue to evolve indefinitely

i also acknowledge i'll be deviating a bit here between various existential points, sociological stuff, and values more broadly; but i think it all falls under the umbrella of what i would refer to as my spirituality

• i don't belong to any organized religion or creed

• i see value in living like figures like Christ or Buddhism's concept of a bodhisattva (i'll say that my understanding of either here is of course imperfect, please excuse my ignorance)

• i see us as having a limited understanding of the nature of the world we live in and our existence, and believe there is more to us being alive than we realize - although what that exactly means i'm not sure

• i find comfort in believing we are either reunited with our loved ones or find some deeper peace and connection when we die... or that we continually return to do what i believe we're here to do:

• i believe we're here to take care of one another first and foremost. i want a world that is driven by the needs of human beings and all beings on our planet rather than some absurd abstraction like capital. society should be driven from the bottom-up, with those having the least power, privilege, voice, and fortune being exalted, protected, and served the most

• i strongly encourage pushing against social norms, particularly when it comes to being generous and kind. i see this most often in my own life when i stop to help someone when others turn their nose. be emotionally authentic and present as often as you safely can and don't close your hearts to the suffering of others

• we should strive for compassion and understanding wherever possible, and learn how to engage with one another non-violently - which includes all of the ways violence manifests, even in how we communicate

• with that said, self-defense through violence is okay - which i say specifically here for a reason: we collectively need to save our planet, it should be our top priority. for as gentle of a soul as i am, i don't see a way to non-violently deal with the world's existing power structures and the ultra wealthy. seeing the world through class is how we unite everyone to this end against those who exploit and pit us against one another

i always give a bit more than i'm asked for in these revospring answers, but it's more interesting that way :-) i appreciate your thoughtful questions!

It came to me almost immediately once I stopped denying I was trans in 2018 - I'm a very emotionally intuitive person and it just felt right. Also, Erika with a "k" any day of the week over using a "c" or "ck"! ;-)

My middle name is an homage to a loved one from childhood and the name I would have given my daughter.

And my last name was chosen by another dear friend. Although, I'll take on Tessa's last name when we get married.

I initially chose a new last name to distance myself from estranged family. This time it'll be different... as Tessa put it: "Once to anonymize yourself and a second time to attach to someone of your own choice" - beautifully put and very true. <3