( CW: light mentions of knife play, cutting, hitting hand-to-hand, and choking )
So much stuff! My sadism comes from a desire to - if wanted, ofc - hurt cute people or give them discipline in ways that give them freedom from choice but can often be very much restricting, and it is usually very non-sexual (my sexuality is very different actually!)

Some of the ways I fulfill that and find my joy are: Impact play, especially with Florentine-style (two-handed) whips and floggers, knifeplay/cutting, paddling, predicament play (where moving/acting in one way or another causes different kinds of pain), pummelling, caning, breathplay/blood chokes, interrogation scenes, fearplay scenes, and even something I got a bit of infamy for back in Florida where I did a chemical invasion play scene! I've also dabbled in other things like very light fire play and slingshots - and honestly a bunch of other stuff really - but they aren't my speciality.

I have a LOT of specific fun stories, and feel free to pry sometimes if you wanna know more, but for the sake of keeping this answer out of novel level word count I'll keep that to explaining later :P

So first things first, I'm probably not telling you anything you don't know but just in case: I'm glad you are identifying but you are still JUST AS trans as anyone else before you reach your goals. You have transitioned, even if you're not in your "final form" yet so to speak. And honestly, the internet is great for that as much as you're able to find outreach. Just involve yourself in trans circles where and when you can, try to help others with advice and support when you can, and stay open to situations that are gonna affirm you. I wish I really had any pointed advice to give you but every community is going to look a little bit different.

If you're wanting to get beyond yearning into actually fulfilling it, sadly this anxious mess of a woman is not gonna be too much help there. I'd say learn from me and don't do what I do and overqualify every situation. Obviously make sure that you're keeping in tune with everyone's consent, that certainly never changes, but just putting yourself out there, being consciously active, and giving what you get will get you a solid part of the way there.

I knew like... a solid 12 years before transitioning, unfortunately. One of my great regrets was to not transition sooner. Almost all of my friends have been femme and I experienced this huge hole in my heart every time I would have camaraderie with women, and it was just tough to analyze at the time and it was just the audhd rearing its head, when every single time what I was feeling was legitimate longing, extreme envy, to just be them. There wasn't so much a key tipping point as much as there was just recognizing that more and more over time and putting words to it, and when I started hanging out with other trans women, it hurt again because that never felt like it was "for me", y'know? "It's for trans women, it was for people born with that feeling", etc. etc. (Which is why I think egg prime directive discourse is complete bullshit and would have saved me years of hell, but that's neither here nor there.) After a while, I just compiled enough knowledge of my feelings, and after being an emotionless robot my whole damn life, eventually I just snapped and said "fuck it." I asked if my partners at the time would use femme pronouns for me, and the FIRST time they did, I broke down crying. I was on HRT about 3 weeks later and it was the best decision I've ever made in my entire life.

Also, if this is more than just a curious question anon, let me just say this: I transitioned in my early 30s. There is ALWAYS still time. You can just be a different gender, and all that shit that tells you that it's only for other people? It's all BS.