god i love that fic thank you for picking it

as for this scene! the story is told more from jeonghan and mingyu's points of view (even if the narration itself is third person limited to jeonghan, we know more about mingyu because of it and because of both their jobs at kasa) than seungcheol's and i wanted that disconnect to hit jeonghan, but also for the reader to remember seungcheol and how he's on the outside of everything. he doesn't know it's the end of the world, he doesn't know exactly how everyone is feeling, and he knows there are things he doesn't know. i liked the idea of jeongcheol having their own issues on the side that they haven't gotten around to talking about, even if it is the end of the world, and how they only ever seem to communicate via mingyu, like they need him for the balance. they're both a little more avoidant when it comes to acknowledging their own feelings, and that's how they end up in this situation where everyone seems to know before them.

i also might as well talk about the camera here, since it's mentioned, but that's a clear line he draws—just like we see in the different scenes, mingyu and jeonghan find themselves in the aquarium store, mingyu and seungcheol find themselves in the camera store, and jeonghan and seungcheol have the apartment. jeonghan draws a line with the camera because he doesn't want to encroach on that space, but he also doesn't want seungcheol to feel obligated, nor does he want seungcheol encroaching in his own.

the real problem with me is that i get really fixated on ultra specific niche tropes that never really make all that much sense when you take them out of the fic that got me fixated on them.

that being said: ambiguous relationships & undefined relationships are a trope (theme?) that i've explored a lot since i started writing fics. initially, when i was still writing for hyunho or for vnc or even all the way back when i was writing for kotlc, i used to try really hard to clarify the boundaries of the relationship, specify that they weren't strictly romantic or platonic but a secret third thing, but i don't feel that pressure so much lately, if pressure's the right word for it? i've had a lot of fun portraying ambiguity in a variety of ways—see: surface tension, where gyucheol are literally in bed together, after an implied fade to black scene, and they're talking about cheol's blind dates, even though it's otherwise obvious that these two adore each other—and i'd like to think that's because i've also grown as a person. cliche as it may be, it's easier to accept now that my writing is open to interpretation and while i may have a specific idea or concept and aim for perfect execution, i'm also more okay to "misinterpretation" or alternate interpretations.

beyond that, rapid fire: rivals/enemies, roommates, childhood friends, space au, scifi au, detective au

1. my doomsday neighbors
   this was my first ever ficmix and the source material was already really interesting and really complete to work with, while also including pairings i wasn't used to writing, so it was fun to take on that challenge. ultimately, i'm really proud of how i was able to weave my favorite scifi influences (along with the book i was reading at the time and the songs i was listening to at the time) into this story that builds off something else. it's also one of the few fics where i started writing blind, with no real idea of where the fic was going or what i wanted the story to be. pair that with jeonghceol as the ship for the fic, and it truly was hard for me, since i feel like bigger/government ships tend to have certain expectations when it comes to fic, but regardless, i do like how this story turned out. it's one i like to revisit whenever i'm in the mood for scifi, but maybe not to start writing/reading a whole new book.

2. somewhere in time, i love you.
   this comes up anytime i get asked this question and i honestly think it's one of the best things i've ever written conceptually. i do think if i were to rewrite the storyline itself that things would change slightly and i could do that better now, but that comes with the nature of being a writer. the song that inspired this fic and ship being two of my favorites of all time already made it so easy, and i do really like my writing in the fic too. i think it's also the most me as opposed to chihiroine.

3. unholy triptych of my sweet uncareful friends
   inspired by the music video for home;run, i genuinely sat there for like. a week straight just rewinding each scene in the mv to piece together a storyline. if my doomsday neighbors was a challenge, then this was a puzzle, since each of the pairings and the different scenes had so many moving parts. it's also the closest to an ensemble fic i've written since my very first (nihilist blues, although there are other since orphanned fics that predate that lol) and it could be fun to properly flesh out a longer, more intentional ensemble fic. that's quite a big project though, so it would definitely have to come after all my current wips.

4. next time you're coming home
   recently, i told a friend i wanted to write more intentionally and with emotional weight to my writing. this particular fic also came to mind since i'd just written it before we had that conversation. i've dabbled with ambiguous endings (see: somewhere in time, i love you.) but it's usually hinted at that the characters end up together, or even if the world ends, that they're all together when it does. with next time you're coming home, i got to explore the uncertainty of a relationship through the pov of an unreliable narrator, a character we know nothing about, and an ending that leaves itself open to interpretation. shorter fics like this are really fun to experiment with style, so it was one of the more fun fics to write, and i like the way it's turned out! i think i can see it influencing my future writing as well too ngl.

on my writing process: a lot of my fics have commentary that accompany them, particularly the longer ones or the more meaningful ones, and that tends to explain the process in detail for that specific fic. for the other ones that don’t have commentary, it’s likely bc i have less to say or the fic was so unplanned that i have no idea what to even say.

either way, the idea comes first. every fic begins with the plot itself, and i weave in the characters or the ship afterwards. sometimes i pick the ship based on who it would fit best, and sometimes i pick the ship to bend them into that situation.
for example (and i picked these examples specifically bc they don't have commentaries out yet or at all):
a fic where i picked the ship based on who it would fit best: everything glows
a fic where i picked the ship to bend them into that situation: surface tension

with everything glows, the initial idea had actually been a gyucheol fic, with seungcheol in jeonghan's position. but the more i started thinking about this fic, and roughly outlining it bc it's a longer fic and i do need like 3 bullet points per chapter just so i can maintain momentum; though i will say three chapters in and i have not stuck to that initial outline at all, so. there is that. anyway. this particular fic needed more of a familial weight to it and i love seungcheol, but he is also the cherished family darling. he didn't suit the story the way jeonghan, eldest son, and mingyu, eldest son, both did. and similarly, because the main pairing changed, the tone of the story and the dynamic also naturally changed to match these characters.

on the other hand, surface tension was not a planned fic. coming off the lowest of lows of the mcat and how draining studying for that and preparing for med school applications was, this was an entirely self serving fic. a time capsule of all the misery of the past few months, with a happier ending than reality because what is fiction is not escapism? that being said, this would have been a perfect jeongcheol fic. swap out mingyu with jeonghan, who's naturally got lower stamina and isn't necessarily the king of positivity, and it would've worked. but i wanted to write gyucheol, so okay, switch them out again and mingyu is the entertainment industry office worker while seungcheol is the jaded and burnout grad student—except, the idea for this fic came from that very first scene of the little brother showing up after witnessing that traumatic event. initially, it would've been easy enough to write both hansol and seungcheol as brothers—except, again, one of my favorite things about writing seungcheol is that he is such a younger brother and taking that away takes away some of the shapes of his character—but i also wanted to explore burnout from the pov of someone who doesn't seem as prone to it. from here, the fic took the shape it did and seungcheol gets to be a cute family maknae while also being a doting hyung for mingyu.

as for my editing process: it's kinda. nonexistent. i write in ellipsus, so i lose the spell check, but i have a copy of the google doc that converts text to html for ao3 posting, so i don't lose the formatting when i like to play around with that, so the only real editing that happens is 3 months later when i'm rereading a fic and i notice a typo and it bothers me so much that i end up sitting up and editing it... only to see another typo and give up and put it off for another day. jokes aside, any developmental editing takes place while i'm writing and rudimentary grammar/copy editing takes place after, when it's been long enough that i can just sift through and make those edits, rather than get caught up in reading my story.

oooooh this is really interesting bc i think it varies depending on whether i'm writing or reading, and this could get really long, but:

there are certain tropes/themes i refuse to write, just bc i'm not comfortable writing them or just entirely disinterested. i feel like these might be a bit controversial, but to each their own, ya know?
1. established relationship: there are ways this can be done right, don't get me wrong, but it's one of the first tags i filter out when i first start reading for a fandom. if i've finished everything in a ship i like, i end up coming back to these fics, but i prefer a good slow burn with all the yearning and pining of people who aren't together. similar reasons for why i don't write it: i just like writing about the yearning and pining, for one, but i also like writing relationships where the characters are en media res within their own storylines, but the relationship is just about to start.
2. omegaverse/mpreg: i'm grouping these together bc they usually tend to be grouped together within fics. i've read a few in the past out of curiosity, but the concept's not my favorite. it veers into uncomfortably weird territory and i would rather not put myself through that for a hobby.
3. mcd: i actually can't say writing mcd is off the table bc i do like writing angst, even if i haven't committed to it as much lately. there's so many terrible things happening in the world rn, i just think having light fics for people to read rn could be nice. that being said, it's obviously angsty to read lol so i guess this isn't truly a non-negotiable.

as for when i'm writing fics, there's a process to it in which the plot dictates the ship that i end up writing. i think gyuhancheol are a perfect example to use bc they are basically all i write rn so:
1. seungcheol has to be a younger brother. this is so so so crucial to his characterization for me. similarly, mingyu and jeonghan have to be older siblings, but there's a little more flexibility if i want to make another member a younger sibling for the plot. the only exception where cheol would be the older brother would be if vernon was his younger sibling, but even then, i think his characterization shines best when it rings true.
2. if it's a rivals plot: it has to be gyuhan.
3. if it's a childhood friends type plot: it has to be gyucheol.
4. jeongcheol are harder to pin down bc there's a specific image of them within the fandom and i sometimes worry that i lose my own vision for them within this other one. i think my doomsday neighbors encapsulates the dynamic i envision them having best though.
5. fitting the three of them together is a lot like a puzzle, but i picture there being a red herring and an anchor. initially, one of them has to shine and the plot as to appear to revolve around them, only for the final act to center the story around the anchor, navigating a firm balance between all three. they're v three body problem, what can i say?

then again, a good enough plot would let me throw the rules out the window to write it, so that brings me to my final point:

truly, i think the biggest non-negotiable i have is that i won't choose the characters for a plot just to write a pairing, i want the plot and setting to choose the characters to best convey the narrative. a lot of my everyday writing is academic/scientific and i sometimes worry that my fics fall flat bc of it, but the ultimate goal is to evoke emotion within a reader and to tell a specific story.

never too late!!!! added bonus my rhinitis has decided to absolutely murder my study streak so yes let's talk about it like dk was clearly onto smth when he was like. why is it always you three? bc. why is it always you three? it's v cute that they share hobbies and therefore hang out together, but the cutest thing about this is their age gap bc on paper, mingyu's 2 years younger, but what with him being an older brother and seungcheol being a younger brother, that almost cancels out? jeonghan's always seemed v chill, like he's definitely an adoring hyung, but i do think jeongcheol in particular love having a doting mingyu around.
also. cheol walking around the airport with a bracelet from mingyu and a watch from jeonghan he's the number one gyuhancheol truther!

was recently rewatching good offer and it's so funny seeing cheol joking about jeonghan's gose image after the betrayal vs mingyu literally quietly checking on jeonghan, not particularly even trying to get back at him—i would even argue that he wasn't even particularly surprised that jeonghan "betrayed" gyucheol, which brings me to the one thing that makes them so endearing: the way they get each other.

of course it's entertaining when they play up their rivalry in mind games or even during sports, but beyond the games—which are truly just the way they flirt with each other, if you think about it—they truly just adore each other. mingyu makes it so obvious bc he looks at everyone like he's in love with them, but jeonghan also looks at mingyu like that, gets shy when he's with mingyu, and he just knows mingyu really well. there's a few instances where the members are trying to figure out who wrote what or smth to that extent and jeonghan always knows mingyu really well. and ofc, mingyu knows jeonghan just as well (see: their mbti gose ep).

gyuhancheol are all v important to me the biggest differentiation between gyucheol and gyuhan as the mingyu ships of the trio are that while gyucheol are puppies falling over each other, with cheol chasing after mingyu and mingyu being a bit of a tsundere, gyuhan are more evenly matched and look at each other when they think the other isn't looking. they've got great chemistry and bickering too, which is the key to get me to really latch onto any ship ultimately!