I'm sry I never meant your decision was wrong. I honestly didn't discuss about it much with anybody so i ranted that much but my intent was not to make u feel guilty. I get ur feelings and how you felt guilty about your parasocialism because I was one of the persons who looked at him highly and took inspiration from. I started writing fanfics cuz of mahae, enjoyed taking pics of sky and it's sad to see things like this. It's just sad to abandon and honestly difficult too. but it's better we focus on building ourselves and as selfish as it sounds, I still like where I am because of him. although I did start with mahae I have also grown to write other things too so i try not to make everything about him. I don't care about the rest of him maybe I'll just give a listen to his songs when he releases. We must let it go. but this feeling is for everybody in nct/or any celebrity as that matter cuz unfortunately nobody came as close to him :(( I'm disheartened that I can't look at the things with same amount of joy. but it's okay. Idc if people think I'm overreacting, maybe it's little embarrassing but yeah