i mean this with genuine patience and respect, but "neurodivergent" is an umbrella term covering ADHD, schizophrenia, PTSD, autism, parkinson's, and more. neurodivergent people aren't just divergent from the "typical person" and then all the same as each other...someone with ADHD and someone with schizophrenia may have nothing in common in how they relate to people.

maybe you'd expect them to be kind or reciprocal because you're both neurodivergent, but for most ND people that shared status doesn't even register. there's no built-in solidarity or common language. we can't even get people to stop using the term "neurodivergent" when they just mean "autistic."

honestly, dropping off the face of the earth with zero communication could be a very neurodivergent thing about them. autism is categorized in large part by the social deficits and communication struggles it causes, including having trouble picking up on indications something is wrong, that they've committed a social faux pax, or even that you're trying to be nice and comfortable to them.

"neurodivergent" doesn't mean anything except "not neurotypical." it doesn't mean "you're nice" or "you care about others in any particular way." it was never a promise of good behavior, so someone hurting you isn't evidence they're faking it.